Self-Love vs. Ego

Many make the mistake of thinking ego, and self-esteem is more or less the same thing. The truth is ego refers to the attitude of distinguishing oneself from others. The ego creates our perceptions and illusions concerning self-image. The ego is the representation of the reality principle within a human being. Self-love which is also referred to as self-esteem would be assurance and confidence in one’s abilities. Self-love is based on direct experience with the core consciousness, and this lies beyond the ego. It is a sense of inner well-being which becomes available when one gets to know their spiritual self. The real self does not derive the meaning of value from thoughts and behavior. On the other hand, the ego is an unhealthy attachment to the person. The ego persists because people attach themselves according to their ideas and pride.

This kind of attachment leads to resentment of any thought that makes one’s idea inferior when compared to other ideas. Because of this resentment, people start to show negative emotions when they are faced with a contrasting opinion, resulting in conflict between parties that is not at all objective. The ego makes people attached to their ideas to the extent they cannot see it coming second to another thought. The ego makes people create personas out of their insecurities so they crave attention and go to lengths so they can showcase their expertise and conviction so as to receive affirmation from the people around or who they hold in high esteem. It is a false sense of self. Others with the same condition go along with this and end up doing a lot of damage by affirming their illusions and those of the protagonist. Self-love is just the opposite in that it does not require affirmations. It does not drive one to seek praise or reward for the sake of personal gain or satisfaction. Self-love is satisfied by the confidence of one’s expertise in a provided field and holds no sense of false pride.

The ego drives one to ridicule the opinions which are different and thus displays the insecurities that lie within people. It is ugly because the insecure usually choose the weakest within their company as the targets because they cannot defend themselves adequately in order to showcase their prowess. Ego makes the individual take a lot of care concerning their superficial trappings, especially about dressing hair even decoration within the home. If a person is true to themselves and lives authentically from the real self, then there should be nothing to represent the way that people want to portray themselves as. It is from a diligent and thorough practice of introspection that people become real. The practice of humility comes in because people are then able to accept themselves indeed as they have been created. False pride or the ego can be distinguished from the truth easily. Self-love does not feel a need to stand out and often works behind the scenes to effect the changes that they need to observe.  

Yan Jiang